Hello my faithful readers, I know, I know it’s an early post but I just am afraid I’ll forget…. I hope you enjoy! I’m sorry for doing this to you guys! New? Click HERE!
“What?” I lick my lips, “What’s so amazing?”
“They need me on the front!” He grins and I sit back down with a thud.
“They need you… They need you one the front?” I feel despair trying to push me under. “They need you to fight? I thought I thought you hated fighting?”
“No, I’m fighting for the right cause now, we’re the good guys, we’re going to bring justice to the land and peace to the people.”
“Wow man, did you get that from a poster?” Jethen smirks and I try not to let anyone to see my fear. My fear of losing Koda. “Good job man, for getting back in the whole fighting thing. I really don’t feel like doing that.”
“Really you seem like such a war guy to me… And no I got it from the little brochure they pass out at training.” He smiles a little and I snap.
“No. No. NO! You’re not leaving, you can’t leave me. You just can’t!” I jump up from my seat and yell, making the whole room stare. “We just got here and if you leave I’m going to be alone and- and.”
And I make a total fool of my self by breaking in tears. I sit back down, trying to control myself.
“Poppy, I have to do this.” He says, sitting next to me, “You don’t know what it means to me.”
“I thought I meant something to you.” I whisper. “I need you to stay. You’re all I have left.”
“I’m going to come back. You know that, we just have to win and then I can come back.”
“You know what? Whatever. Have fun. Make sure you don’t forget about me, I’ll be here. Probably making bandages just in case you blow off your leg or something! See ya later! Go be a super hero!” Bitterness surges through me, anger follows and soon I’m shaking with rage.
“No. Poppy, it’s not like that.” He looks hurt. Good. I want him to know that he’s making me bleed inside, that while he’s gone I will probably die without him. “I need to do this. You wouldn’t get it, you’re a girl.”
This is where he makes his fatal mistake.
“Right. Just a girl…Just a girl.” I muter. I walk away, my whole world has fallen apart in the course of five minutes, I just lost the most important person in the world to me. I storm into the room that me and Koda were sharing I grab all his stuff and throw it into a back. By the time I’m done someone’s at the door. “Come in.”
“Hey. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean that. I swear.” Koda stands in the door, an apology on his face.
“Sure you did. I’m just a girl, it was dumb to think I meant anything else to you.” I hand him the overstuffed bag. “Here’s all your stuff, have fun. Goodbye.”
Then I close the door in his face. Tears spilling down my face, I still love him, I don’t want him to go. I sit with my back against the door, sobbing. Remi was right, I suck with this whole relationship thing.
It’s late in the afternoon, Koda’s leaving. I walk outside, pretending that I’m going for a walk, that I don’t care. But I really do, I really care quite a lot. Maybe I’m being selfish? But I something’s holding me back from saying sorry. I don’t know what though. So I act like I don’t care, I’ll get over it soon. Koda runs up to me before I can get to the tree line. We’re at a different doorway than the one we found when we first got here.
“Look I already said I’m sorry. And I still love you. And you’re not just some girl. And I’m sorry I hurt you. But if you can’t forgive me, then fine. I can’t ask that of you. I just want to give you this.” He hands me an old blue pencil, it’s dented and dull and really small. “I gave it to my sister to remind her of me. Just don’t forget me. That’s all I ask. And your still my flower, and you were right. You look a lot prettier when you don’t look like an animal.”
Before I have time answer, he runs off and hops into the truck with the buddies he’s going to war with, I clutch the pencil with my hands. I had bathed after getting to camp and I guess he did notice. I feel tears coming again so I walk into the tree line, where I watch the truck leave with the soldiers. I watch the truck leave with my world.