~You’re My Sunshine~

“You’re my sunshine. My only sunshine.

You make me happy. When skies are grey.

You’ll never know dear.

How much I love you.

Please don’t take my sunshine away.”

I open my eyes slowly, her cries fill the air. Soft little whimpers. She’s probably hungry. Or bored. I peel off the blue covers, smiling to myself. I walk down the creak wooden hallways and jiggle the handle as I walk into her room. She can’t see me yet, her crib blocks her view. I creep to the edge of her rail and peer over.

“Hey baby!” I smile. She looks at me and smiles back, her little teeth poking through her gums. She reaches a cubby hand to my long hair that hangs into the bed and grabs it. She gives it a small tug, not a hard one, just a love tug. I laugh a little and make a face. She laughs a little. I grab her by the arm pits and balance on my hips as I straighten the crib and hand her her blanket. Her blue grey eyes look back at me and she whimpers. So not bored, maybe a diaper change will help. I lay her down and let her play with a stuffed animal and change her out of her onesie. I put a hand band on her soft tuft of red hair and start to walk to the kitchen. She whimpers a little more and looks at the fridge longingly. I kiss her on the head and set her on the floor as I get a cup of milk for her. She smiles up at me again, I can never get over those eyes. They make me grin every time. I hand her the milk and she starts to suck on it. She’s the best thing that’s happen to be. Sure sh came a little sooner than I thought but she’s perfect. She’s the only thing that keeps me smiling. The only thing that makes me dance or sing.



Hey, I’m here. I realized I haven’t posted anything in a really really long time and I feel bad. I just have nothing to post right now, my creative juices are being used in someone else’s smoothie right now. Anyway, I have a snippet from the novel I’m working on and  I thought why not? So I’m sorry if it makes like zero sense but it makes me happy when I read it so, enjoy.


I take a deep breath as I walk to the locker. Every pair of eyes are on me. Maybe not every pair but enough to make me blush. I’m too old to be here. Too old to be a sophomore. A flipping sophomore. I’m too old. I ignore their gazes and look down at my feet, I just need to get to my locker. And then to my class. And then home. I only have to get to my locker. I stare at my shoes. The red converse Phoenix bought me. The shoes that are my favorite color. They stand out from the black and white but I don’t mind. I’m proud of my outfit today, I didn’t have Camo’s help. I’m wearing a red flannel over a black tank top and a pair of shorts. It’s too cold for shorts I think. But I’m so used to the cold that I wear them, even in the snow.I sling my backpack over my shoulder and decided that the school board should invest on some new flooring. I walk three, four, five more steps and I’m at my locker. My fingers fumble with the lock but it finally opens. I open my backpack and sort through what I need for the next class and what can stay. I glance at the inside of the locker door as I start to close it. My eyes catch on a picture. That’s new. I grab it, it’s a picture. Of me. And Kace. I smile slightly, we’re in the back of a pickup truck. He’s grinning like he has the world and I’m dancing around him, my hair tangled in a flower crown. He’s ten and I’m six, I cock my head in confusion. Who put this here?

“I figured you would want something to make it feel like home,”  A familiar voice murmurs. I don’t even have to turn to remember the voice. I close my locker and find Phoenix wearing a crooked grin.

“What are you doing here?” I ask, my heart beating to strange rhythm. I can’t help but grin a little more at him. His russet eyes staring back into my amber ones. His fingers rest on the locker next to mine. Absently mindedly playing with the lock.  

“Well. I was thinking, that a new school is terrifying. And. I technically never finished high school. So I figured, you would need a friend. And that’s who I can be,” He moves a little closer. My eyes drop again, my smile fully fledged. I can’t help but glance up at him again, my cheeks slightly red.

“Well. I’m thinking that, we, as two people,” I pause wondering if I should take the leap, “Are more than just friends?”

“Ah, friends don’t kiss on a regular basis do they?” He asks, dimples appearing. Memories bounce through my head, his lips around mine, my hands in his hair, his fingers on my face, the world absent around us.

“No. I don’t think so,” I shake my head, my hands hugging my books tightly. “But I’m not an expert.”

“Ok, then my proposal changes,” Phoenix grabs the books from my arms and laces his fingers with mine as he turns me to the hall.

“How so?” I arch a brow, as we start walking. I’m suddenly able to look every single student in the eye. I’m somehow not afraid, I’m suddenly ready to take them on.

“Well, maybe I won’t be just your friend. Maybe…” He lowers his head to whisper in my ear, his lips brushing the fly away hairs from my braid. “Maybe I’ll be more.”

“I like that proposal a lot more,” I say with another smile, a different one. A smile of feeling safe. Something I haven’t felt since… since before the cell.

“Me too,” He kisses my hand, very softly. Those lips that had just tickled my ears now leaving my hand tingling.  We continue to walk through the sea of people. Me, 18. Him, 19. Me, sophomore. Him, junior. Both, too old. But just the right age to know we’ll survive.


If this is you, 

Sorry. But I hoped you liked it either way. 🙂 

~Yay, I did something~

It was the night after Christmas and all around the clock,

Not a gift was unopened, not even the socks.

The paper was thrown away with care,

In hope that a West Coast snow ball fight* would not be there.


The children were in their rooms, playing with toys,

Each one making its own unique noise.

And Mother and Father, new dishes unwrapped,

Were ready to settle on the couch for a nap.


Don’t ask why but I wrote that. And I’m slightly proud for no reason. Now you guys get to read it, be proud of me. No just kidding. If you made it this far, you’re a wonderful human being and you deserve puppies. *Goes into back room and grabs puppies* 

*Hyperventilates at cuteness* Anyway. I hope you guy shad a good Christmas and New Years and all those Holidays that are crammed into one month for no reason. ((I personally think there should be more holidays in May and September but what do I know.)) Comment below if you made it this far in my weirdness and random ramblings. And yea, I know it’s not Christmas. 

*A Californian snow ball fight is what happens when it is not cold enough for you to have snow so everyone throws balled up wrapping paper at each other. Parents do not often like these snow ball fights because A) It’s a pain to clean up and B) It knocks things over inside and breaks them. I speak from experience.

It’s A New Year, Yay?

For a lot of people a New Year is a new chance and for me it’s… ‘Crap, I’m getting older.’ I’m not even that old but it’s insane how much time I see fly by. I feel like I’m wasting my whole life when I sleep in till 10 in the morning. Anyway, I’m planning on using my time more wisely because surfing Pinterest for hours at of time is not something you can do for a living. Shame. But something I can do for a living is writing. Which is something I will be doing more often. And reading I’ll be reading more because it’s good for my soul. Anyway a review of the year for your pleasure. tumblr_n9mwz4d7re1rw6hzpo1_500

What I’ve Been Writing: Well, this year was slightly disappointing in this field because I wasn’t sure what I wanted my novel to be about until the end of Summer. No matter, I now have all the characters well thought out and the plot is amazing. So, I’m hoping to have the rough draft done by the end of this year, I have high hopes. Most of this year was finding out what my character’s like or what they would do in certain situations. For example, I figured out that Kace has an addiction to Coca Cola and that Camo has painted their whole entire hide out.

What I’ve Been Reading: Well I think I read about 50 books this year, which I’m pretty happy with. I wish I read more over the summer but I was doing other things. Some of my favorites this year was The Lunar Chronicles . I love it so much and I’m so sad it’s over… Oh well, it was a fun ride. Another book I really loved is Fahrenheit 451, I read this over the summer as my non-fluff book. It was a really wonderful book and I seriously recommend it.

That’s mostly it, it’s been a pretty good year for me. I watch in fear for our society and nation but I’m not going into that. I hope you guys had a good year as well!