Not like you

There so many people in the world.

Yet without you….

None of them seem to matter

So many people

Yet none of them are like you

As those many people rush by me…

I can only think of you

Because you are the one who stuck by me.

You’re the one who made the memories

You’re the one who decided to stay

You’re the one who actually cared

And sure. Some of the others care. But they don’t care like you do.

Because even halfway accross the country.

You care enough to ask why I’m crying.

Drawing in the Snow~

Hey guys, I’m a little nervous about posting this because I’m not sure what I think about it quite yet… Anyway, I would love it if you could read it and comment below what you thought.

I knew everything about her. I knew everything about her because she told me. I knew what her favorite color, flower, scent, shirt. I knew where she lived and what office she worked in. I knew because she had trusted me. And now for some reason she didn’t. I hadn’t done anything, not that I knew of a least. One day she’s telling me we’re meant to be and the next she’s not picking up my calls, not answering my texts. She didn’t even respond when I said to hi to her on her way to work. Which is how we got to now. Me standing in the snow with only a sweatshirt and her in her warm heated office.

I look up at the window, wondering how to get her attention. I look around. My eyes settle on a row of cars. Old things. They didn’t look like they’d been driven in a while. I try to really think. I have found that having a girlfriend is harder than one would think. Not only do you have to love a girl with all your heart, you have to keep her happy. And to do that, you have to change your thinking. You have to think like them. I learned this the hard way. Apparently, bringing your girlfriend to hang with all your buddies… is not ok. No one told me about that.

So as I look at these old cars, I have to think about what her opinion would be. How can I make these old cars look romantic? Oh! Oh! That’s not a horrible idea. You’re a genius.

I go to one of the cars. I draw a heart on it. My finger tracing through the snow. The flakes crunching underneath my fingertips. The smooth surface of the black car slowly appearing. I draw a arrow through the heart, thinking it’ll look more appealing. Then I go to the  next car. I draw a single line on that one. On the next I write the word love. On the last, the word you. There. That should do it.

I grab my phone a text her one more time, praying she’ll read it.

I left you a message, look out the window.

Then as an after though I add,

Please.

I sit on a stoop of an office entrance. Basically I’m loitering, while simultaneously hoping I don’t get arrested or something. Do you really get arrested for standing around doing nothing?

Snow starts to fall. Crap. I walk back out to the cars, the letters are starting to get covered. I trace The letters over and over. My hands starting to freeze. This better be worth it. I don’t like snow. Or rain. Or anything cold.

A few minutes later. I see her look out the window. Thank the heavens, my fingers are freezing. After a couple seconds, she’s outside. Her arms wrapped around me. I wrap mine around hers.

“So why were you mad at me?” I ask, pulling her away.

“I just heard some rumors and…” She laughed a little, “it was a stupid reason. It doesn’t matter. Thank you.”

“Of course. Am I allowed in your office?” I rub my arms dramatically, “it’s freezing.”

“It’s not that cold.” She says with a smirk.

“Yes. Yes it is. Look, you can see my breath!” I exhale hard through my mouth. “I look like a smoker.”

“Ugh fine. But don’t let my boss see you.” She laughed. I continue to blow out my breath.

“Look. See that? It’s cold.”I say, joking.  She pushes me inside, laughing. Everything in it’s place. For now.

 

Soo, I’m dying to know what you think. ((That’s not sarcastic I swear)) I hope you enjoyed it. A like gets you a cake and a comment gets you a life time supply of waffles. 

My Randomness In One Post

Hey friends! You’re beloved rambler is here. Yes, tis I, the one who never posts anything. *Tries to look innocent and fails*  

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Homework is harddd ok?? But any who, I’m here now so stop complaining. (Yes, I know I was the one complaint but details are just boring) This post is basically just some random stuff. I have some narratives and some writing prompts and fun stuff like that. SO basically I’m making you happy so I don’t have to post more this week. Let’s get started! 

Falling:


I stood on the top of the building. My feet hanging off the edge. I hear the roar of the cars and trucks beneath me. A bird soars by, a pigeon maybe. I stay still, listening to my breath travel in and out of my lungs. I stay still, almost falling. But not quite yet. I stay still, feeling the breeze in my face. Suddenly there’s a jerk, a feel of a hand on my back, a wave of panic. I fall, mouth screaming, arms flailing, tears flying from my eyes. I plummet, the wind yanking my eyes back. I plummet, the cars getting closer.  I plummet, my breath gone, heart beating, thoughts fleeing. All I can think about is the dirty pavement that will be covered by my body. I fall. Then. I jerk upward. Like a parachute deploying. A hand has caught me. A gentle loving hand. A hand that holds me with such care that I feel safe. A hand that has a hole in it. A scar so ugly it’s beautiful. A scar that testifies his love. A scar of the cross.  My God has saved me. My God has caught me in his palm. He has save me. He lowers me to the ground slowly, careful that I don’t fall. His movements graceful and planned out. Like he had know this would happen ever since time began. I don’t want to step out if his palm but I know I have to. I have to go do his work. I have to go and show others his hand. I have to show others his scars of love. I have to show others his gentle loving hands that save us from falling. From falling into sin.

Hopefully y’all enjoyed that. It made me really happy while writing it. Comment below what you think. Next thing, a narrative for how my auditions for the Wizard of OZ workshop I was doing.

Narrative- Theater-

Heart pounds, knees shake, voice wobbles. Get control of you nerves. Otherwise you won’t get the part. You’ve done this before. You’ve gone through auditions before but you’re just as nervous. The first person goes up on the stage when their name is called. You pray a silent prayer that you weren’t the first person be called. You thank the heavens you don’t have a last name that starts with A. But of course the first person that goes has been doing theater since she was 7. She’s been doing dance since she was 4. And don’t forget she came out of the womb taking voice lessons. So as she sings your confidence shrivels up and dies.

You know you’re gonna get a smaller part by the time your name is called. You’ve been doing theater for a year. And even if it’s a workshop where everyone HAS to get a part, you worry you’ll be banned from the theater if you go up and show off the skill you lack. You take a few deep breaths then walk up the steps the the stage. You’re friend gives you a worried look, remembering the last year’s audition. The one were you tried to sing while you were sick.

You sing. You dance. You act. The singing was fine. At least you didn’t break anyone’s ears. The dancing sucked. Like a lot. The acting was actually… It was actually good. But you’re trying out for Glinda and the Wicked Witch who need they’re singing voices…

Two days later. You get an email. As you pour over it you find your parts. Mostly background stuff. You’re eyes finally find your larger part. Auntie Em. That’s cool, it’s a bigger part than last year at least. And you have a solo singing part… Hopefully you don’t botch that.

 

Well fellow people of earth, maybe that held your attention? Maybe not? I would love to hear what you think! If you want to know a secret I will tell you something about bloggers, Bloggers love it when you comment. (It wasn’t me who told you though) Now, you’re welcome to stay but I have to go take over the world I’l see you all later! Remember to comment below. ⇓⇓

Newsies!~

Oh my gosh. So I went and saw Newsies today and wow. That’s really all I can say, wow. It was absolute perfection, or as close as you can get anyway. It was so good.

Let me paint you a picture. Think the movie, now think a billgillion times better. Think, better story line, better singing, better dancing, better score, better acting, better characters, better everything. Better musical.

I don’t think I can tell you how much I love this. Every time a song came on, I became giddy. Every time I breathed, chills ran down my spine. It was magical. I have no words.

Also, the set was super boss. Like, I had no idea metal structures could be moved around like that. It was perfect. I’ve been waiting forever to see this and now I’m madly in love. Like I’m not kidding. I know you all probably think I’m a dork because I love this so much but whatever. It’s just who I am.

The mainly male cast is also super cool because the dancing is a lot more different. It’s more athletic. That’s the only word I can think of. Lots of back flips and jumping around. King of New York was a tap number was so good. Every single song made me smile. One song almost brought me to tears, which is a big deal because nothing ever does that. So yea, it was good.

Anyway, if it’s coming near you, go see it. No matter the cost, go see it. I don’t care if you don’t like musicals, you should still see it. If it’s not near you, listen to the sound track because it’s perfect. I’m done ranting, sorry. This might be my new favorite and I’m listening non stop to the music and my family thinks I have problems. Which I probably do… Oh the perks of being a dork. X)

Have a good day and good job you read this whole thing. See you guys later! (If you’ve seen Newsies comment below, I will rant with you even more. 😉 )

Mental Noise~

My mind screamed at its self.

Why was I being such a drama queen?

No one cared.

No one wanted to hear me ramble about how hard I had.

Why couldn’t I get that through my thick head?

Why couldn’t  I understand the fact that no one is here to listen?

‘No one cares. Be quiet.’ My brain told me, ‘Keep your head down. Write it on paper. The paper will listen.’

I fight the urge to yell at people. For one reason I want someone to hear.

And there is someone. But he seems far away. Distant.

For some reason I didn’t feel as close as I used too.

But now, now things are different.

I don’t tell people what they don’t care about hearing.

I know where to find him when I need to talk.

I know how to control the mental noise.

Alone~

I shouldn’t feel alone.

I have God with me.

But why is it when I’m with people do I feel like I’m choking on loneliness?

I’m lost in a sea of people.

People who don’t know me.

People who think they know me but when I act like myself, they get scared.

Because I’m different.

Because people are afraid of what they don’t understand.

And they don’t understand me.